Holy Mother of Twins!
Our inclination as parents is to provide equal treatment to all our children. Nothing begs for “all things equal” more than twins. Considering these two people share the same parents, womb and sometimes the genetic code, we naturally imply their equality. God Bless Freddyka, our front office coordinator and mother of twins! Simply put, “Not only is this impossible, there are serious flaws with this thinking.”
Foremost, every person is unique. That means each child is going to make a special contribution to the family and need a special something from you as a parent. Freddie encourages new moms of twins to embrace each child's character, and avoid categorizing their traits from the very beginning. “Labeling a child by saying, ‘Oh, this is the troublemaker, and this one is the angel’ or ‘this one is the smart one and this one is the sporty one’ will only undermine your little ones from becoming whole.”
“I've always corrected people when they ask which one does this? or which one is that? The answer truly depends on the day you ask me.” She feels that treating her twins as individuals has been key to her boys independence from each other and divergent personal interests. “I’ve always allowed them to make their own decisions, like what kind of haircut to get, and what they want wear, instead of always having to match each other just to go along with the twin cliche.”
Balancing parental resources and mitigating sibling rivalry is a challenge for every parent. Watching a mother of twins parent two charming, well-adjusted, and very different boys is quite remarkable. How she remains so collected and clear is an even more remarkable phenomenon. That’s our Freddyka!